Eradicate or Embrace?

Bottom line – life is tough.  Scott Peck begins his book The Road Less Travelled with this thought.  Buddha says it’s one of the Four Noble Truths. (Life is suffering.)


I pride myself on taking responsibility for my behaviours including what I manifest in my life.  Taking responsibility though,  can be so challenging.  Sometimes it just seems easier to go into blame mode.  But I know that never works.  It accomplishes nothing – except more pain.

There are times (thankfully less and less) that I go into a funk so deep it scares me.  I watch myself.  I know I am losing control.  The pain and anger I am feeling is not really about someone or something else, but about me.  I watch ‘her’ and tell her to stop but it is without conviction.  The need to lash out is stronger.  And the pain goes deeper.  So deep I wonder if I’ll ever come out.

And then I pray.  Please.  Help me. Three words.  And within minutes I fall to sleep, emotionally and spiritually exhausted.

Upon waking I know I have to work on this if I am to feel better about myself.  Relax.  Process.  Meditate.  Journal.  Read uplifting teachings.  All this with the intention of eradicating that part of myself – be rid of her once and for all.

It was not a surprise to find out that was the last thing I needed to do.  I teach this stuff.  Eradicate?!  I needed to integrate what I know to be true at a much deeper level.

‘She’ needs love.  She needs acceptance and approval.  She needs to be embraced fully for who she is.  And she needs it from me.

She is a part of me.  If I am to truly love myself that means loving ALL of me, not just what I approve of, what I appreciate, not just the ‘good’ stuff.

I bring her into my arms and invite her into my heart.  I  embrace her, wholly.  I tell her I love her unconditionally.  I accept and approve of her. Her purpose was to teach me.  I thank her.

I are calm.  I breathe deeper, feeling connected to my higher power, knowing through my tears, that I have a voice and that it is safe to express that voice, openly, and with love.

I forgive.  My self.  Again.

and the Universe Unfolds~~~

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